Someday Syndrome

The Blog is Dead! Long Live the Blog!

In May 2006, I started a journey of personal transformation, a journey focused on getting rid of the word someday from my life. For the past two years, I have blogged about this journey, usually laughing, sometimes whining and even shedding a few tears. But I always learned something and passed that learning along to you through my Someday Lessons. Coming up with those lessons has made look at every experience as a personal growth opportunity.

And now my story is mostly told. I know what my dreams are, I'm actively pursuing them and I've cleared (for the most part) the emotional, mental and physical clutter from my life. I've opened up the path to success and now it's just a matter of staying on track and working on my dreams step by step.

I'm not, however, the only one who suffered from Someday Syndrome. I believe that almost everyone at least at one point in their life has let the word someday block the path to his or her dreams.

So, as of tomorrow (or whenever the magic of the Internet decides to accept the switch) this blog will be available only at http://someday.typepad.com. The main domain, http://www.somedaysyndrome.com, will point to a brand new site, featuring Someday Syndrome interviews with people throughout the blogosphere and in my personal corner of the world. I'm also taking on three lab-rats who've agreed to run the maze of curing Someday Syndrome and to share their journeys with you on an ongoing basis. Plus, I'll keep you updated on my own journey.

And as always, with each post you'll still get the Someday Lessons – my own interpretation of what I see in the lives of others.

See you on the other side!

Someday Lessons:

• Recognize when something has run its course and end it before it drags on too much.
• Nothing ever really ends. It just evolves into something new and different.

P.S. For those subscribed via RSS Feeder, you should make the transfer no problem, but unfortunately for those subscribed via email, you will need to resubscribe at the new site. Once it is up and running, I'll send you an email reminder.

Vacation Notice

My friend Cate visits this week for my 39th birthday (this coming Sunday). We're starting in Madrid today, then returning to San Sebastian on Friday.

I'll be back blogging mid-next week.

In the meantime, feel free to browse the archives and review some previous Someday Lessons.

Do It Now, Not Someday

Yesterday we hopped on the train down to Madrid to celebrate Pride and return home Sunday. Next weekend we go down to the Barcelona area for a friend's birthday, then Cate's visit starts the 22nd and I return to Madrid to meet her.

When I lived in Toronto, I never did this much traveling. Montreal was no farther away than Barcelona is now and yet the last time I went to Montreal for pleasure was in 1990. There was always a good reason not to go – lack of money, lack of place to stay, lack of time… but really it all came down to a lack of momentum. When I had a house, had a large group of friends, had full time work, I fell into a comfort trap.* I said that I wanted to travel more, but I never got around to it. I told people that I would do it someday.

Now, I travel when I want to. I don't live for someday any more. I live now. Of course I'm not extravagant about my traveling – for example I did say no to Cate's suggestion of doing Bulgaria/Romania this summer because I didn't want to travel on my credit card. I might be more adventurous now, but I'm certainly not reckless.

After all, if I don't do it now, when will I?

Someday Lessons:

• Don't live for someday – break free of your comfort trap.
• So, what's the someday you're waiting for?

*As always, I highly recommend Judith Sills' book, The Comfort Trap.

Recording My Progress

(Part 5 in a series where I'm working on creating a profound and lasting change)

The final step in the process of creating change that lasts is to write it down. I already do this every day through my online writing group. At the beginning of each week we tell others about our goals and then comment on what we've done each day.

Next week I will look at the five other tips Tina mentions in her blog post. This weekend, however, I won't think about my writing at all as we're heading down to Girona province (near Barcelona) for a wedding (and finally the weather has turned hot and sunny!)

Someday Lessons:

• Sometimes what you're already doing will dovetail nicely with what you want to be doing.
• Progress is best made when you take time off as well.

Expanding My Circle

Tonight I get to socialize with my fellow language teachers. The owner of the academy I teach at has invited everyone who works there out to dinner at a fancy restaurant. Other than the administrative staff, I've never chatted with any of my coworkers for more than a minute. I arrive only a few minutes before class and leave immediately afterwards, so I don't interact with anyone. Fortunately I have an outgoing personality, or it could end up a disaster. It still could if the other teachers all stick together in small groups.

I've been to parties like that, where everyone is content to stay in safe little circles and newcomers have to be pretty much obnoxious to break into them. And I'm so not obnoxious (siblings – say nothing!). Given the brief encounters I've had with the professors, however, I'm certain that won't be the case tonight.

Of course tonight's dinner happens two weeks before I'm done teaching for the summer, so this won't help integrate me into the academy's culture much. But at least I'll have made some connections for when school starts up again in September.

Someday Lessons:

• Even if an action seems pointless, look for a way to create lateral or unexpected benefits.
• Never say no to a free dinner, especially at a good restaurant.

A Productively Unproductive Day

I have nothing else to talk about because as usual for a Tuesday, I spent the day exhausted for no reason. I had a productive day yesterday and today I'm wiped. Good thing I had no outstanding  work today. Instead, I spent the day doing stuff around the house, like folding laundry, preparing  macaroni and cheese for dinner (made with a really sharp old crumbly goat cheese), and general tidying up.

Raul, a friend, and I then went to see the new Indiana Jones movie (which is one of those-so-bad-it's-good movies), and now we're relaxing before watching Operacion Triunfo (the Spanish Pop Idol).

Of course I wasn't totally unproductive. I taught my morning English class, contributed to an online writing workshop, and worked on some other writing.

Someday Lessons:

• Even when you've had an unproductive day, you've likely achieved more than you think.
• If you are achieving your goals, not every day needs to be super-productive.

Too Much Fun?

Cate has booked her flight, so it's now official: I will have a Canadian visitor here in my new home and I can show off Raul to someone!

In deciding when Cate should come I had to go through what plans we had for the weekends through the summer. We have something happening at least one day on the weekends from now until the middle of August.

I wold love to be more spontaneous, to not make plans and let the mood guide us, but then again, Raul and I are both a bit control-freakish so not having plans would drive us both crazy.

Starting tomorrow, here are our next eleven weekends:

1. Friends over for dinner
2. Parentsitting Raul's dad (and a beach picnic with my Euro-cousins?)
3. A work dinner (just me)
4. A wedding near Girona (Catalonia)
5. The San Sebastian Pride Party (and our anniversary)
6. Madrid Pride
7. A friend's birthday in Barcelona
8. Friends from France visiting
9. My birthday/Cate's visit
10. A long weekend away, likely camping
11. And friends visiting from Madrid for a week (and a visit to the World Expo in Zaragoza).

Someday Lessons:

• Don't wish to be something you're not – accept your nature and enjoy it.
• Surround yourself with friends and family – no matter where they are.

Active Laziness

When I first arrived in France for my sabbatical, I often felt guilty if I wasn't productive. I didn't let the guilt consume me or even push me to work; I simply did my best to ignore it. In doing so, I learned that I really like doing nothing and arranged my life so that doing nothing is an option pretty much whenever I want.

Like today for example. Other than teaching two English classes and puttering around the house, I napped, uploaded photos to Facebook, and napped some more.

Tomorrow I'll be productive again, if I feel like it.

Someday Lessons:

• Figure out what you really want and arrange your life accordingly.
• Don't let societal norms and the word "should" make you feel guilty.

Cheese is Good Food

Starting this past Saturday, for one glorious meal each weekend, I am opening up my diet. This weekend I reveled in cheese. Raul and I had gone to Pamplona to visit a friend. On Saturday we went out for dinner and I started the meal with a cheese salad – lettuce still crispy but slightly warm cubes of a colby-like cheese, a 3-inch by 1-inch wheel of goat's cheese flash fried on both sides to create a crisp shell, the whole thing drizzled with a white fondue.

My perennial sinus problems prevented me from smelling the dish, but the combination of textures – crispy, crunchy, smoothly grainy, soft and liquidly warm – and the flavours – fresh, pungent, innocuous, and tangy – made worth it every moment of my three months without such foods.

To mop up the last bits of cheese, I used a warm whole wheat dinner roll with a thick brittle outer shell and dense soft innards.

The main course was something I could eat any day: secreto de cerdo, green beans and carrots, so although very tasty, it didn't send me into raptures.

I ended the meal with a square of blueberry cheesecake consisting of a thin layer of cake, a frothy layer of filling made from Queso de Burgos not cream cheese, and topped with a blueberry jelly. The outside world disappeared while I partitioned off small pieces of dessert with my spoon and melted each morsel in my mouth before swallowing it.

Next Saturday, we're going to a Eurovision party. The treats the host will serve excite me as much as (or more than) the party itself does.

Someday Lessons:

• Savouring occasional treats is much more fulfilling than unthinking consumption.
• Having without anticipating first robs you of half the experience.

Madge & Me in Paris

Yesterday Raul's best friend, who is a member of Madonna's fan club, bought tickets for her Hard Candy tour which hits Paris in in late September. I've never seen her in concert and if it weren't for Raul, I wouldn't spend the money (despite secretly longing to go).

On the plus side, the show is in Paris, which means spending a weekend there. And Jordi managed to get tickets in the first section right in front of the stage: the mosh pit.

The only drawback? The new album is definitely not one of my favourites. However, the woman always puts on a wicked spectacle and we'll be surrounded by screaming fans who'll for sure infect me with their enthusiasm even if I'm not into every song myself.

Someday Lessons:

• Some dreams need a catalyst to come true.
• Open yourself to the enthusiasm of others and enjoy life more.