Someday Syndrome

My Wonderfully Silly Man

I go to bed most nights laughing. It's Raul's fault. You see, I have this teddy bear (named Notae – he's from the former Canadian department store Eaton's) and he's the perfect size to slip under my shoulder when I'm sleeping on my stomach (he keeps the shoulder from hurting). In other words, yes, I still sleep with a stuffed animal.

Raul, however, thinks it's quite fun to move Notae about the room. For example, one night the bear was hanging upside down from the curtain rod. I asked Raul if Notae was being a gymast. “No,” Raul said, “he thinks he's a bat.” Last night Notae was sitting on his head, perched on the edge of the bookshelf: “he's doing yoga and meditating” Raul told me.

Someday Lessons:

• There's no better way to end the day than falling asleep with a smile on your face.
• Let yourself be silly – get creative with your surroundings.

Wandering Through the Past

I have another blog-life outside of this one. I use it to practice my Spanish. It's called Fotolog. Raul introduced it to me. Each day we post a photo and add text to explain or enhance the photo (My Flog, Raul's Flog)

Today, Raul talked about Bananarama which reminded me of their first success in Canada: Shy Boy. This song, along with Rough Trade's High School Confidential and The B-52s Rock Lobster, introduced me to New Wave.

As you can tell by the choice of songs that my introduction to New Wave came about at the same time as I started to realize that I was more than a bit different from the rest of my classmates - that perhaps I might be gay.

Many kids would have hid their love of these songs, but not me. I knew being a fan of Shy Boy would likely get me beaten up, but it never occurred to me to hide it. People's reactions were their problems. I knew grade school would end eventually and I'd find others who "liked the same music as me."

Thanks for reminding me of my youthful inner strength, Raul!

Someday Lessons:

• Look back through your life and celebrate the moments you showed more strength than you thought you had.
• What was one of your self-defining moments from childhood?

YouTube Videos

• Bananarama: Shy Boy
• Rough Trade: High School Confidential
• B-52s: Rock Lobster

Too Much of a Good thing

What's up with multiple blog posts in a single day? Two of my favourite organizing sites: Unclutterer and the Apartment Therapy group of blogs have decided that as many as three, four or five posts in a single day is a good thing.

I know that they have lots of information and that the site is designed to create income for the blog owners. Therefore lots of visitors who can see lots of different topics would seem like a good thing. However, I'm on the edge of no longer visiting the sites. I feel that I just don't have the time to scroll through the very visually busy site to read the various pieces for the day.

When Unclutterer started, I loved the simple, snappy posts. Now the articles are quite long, which means more work finding the latest entries. The Apartment Therapy group of sites have become visually cluttered as well as informationally cluttered, making me wonder if I should offer them my own organizing services.

It's all too bad really. I had been enjoying them so...

Someday Lessons:

• More of a good thing often creates a bad thing.
• Improvements without thought aren't improvements.

A Healthy Alex is a Happy Alex

After putting up with pain and the trials and tribulations of the sugar-detox, today I learned that I'm a healthy man.

In January I received a Spanish health card, so took advantage of that and booked myself a checkup. I got the full spectrum of bloodwork done and everything out normal. The only thing that I could improve is my good cholesterol which is on the low side of normal. That's easily remedied with some more exercise (which I've committed to anyway).

And now, because the results are so exciting, I'm going to share them:

• Total cholesterol: 148 mg/dL (anything under 200 is a good thing)
• Good cholesterol (HDL): 40.3 mg/dL (normal range for men is 40 to 50)
• Bad cholesterol (LDL): 96.5 mg/dL (under 100 is optimal)
• Triglycerides: 56 mg/dL (healthy is anything under 150)
• Blood glucose: 80 mg/dL (normal is between 70 and 110)*

Someday Lessons:

• Don't play the Someday Game with your health – schedule regular checkups.
• When you have good news, tell people.

* 110 in Spain but 150 according to several U.S. websites.

A Perfectionist Tigger

I used to think that I was a Christopher Robin, a kid with a grand imagination, but slightly outside of it all. Recently I've realized I'm much more of a Tigger. I bounce. I discover something new and say “ooh Tiggers like that!” and then dive right into without thinking it through or bothering to learn more. I'll learn as I go.

However, I'm a Tigger with perfectionist leanings. I want to do whatever I try perfectly. Doing things perfectly first try is very rare, next to impossible actually. So, when I discover I can't do whatever perfectly, I get bored and look for the next new thing that will make me bounce.

I'm at that point with my writing. Over the past two months I've been working hard on my writing skills. I'm improving greatly, but I've also realized how much further I have to go. This would be the point where Tigger would leave, where he'd say “Tiggers don't like writing” and find something new.

Fortunately I'm not fully Tigger. I can resist the temptation to bounce away from a little work. As much as I hate learning that I'm not the best natural writer in the world, I won't give up. I know that I'm a good writer, but like anything, real skill comes from practice.

Someday Lessons:

• Don't let your inner perfectionist stop you from pursuing your dreams.
• Equally, don't let your inner Tigger bounce you away from something you love just because it's not easy.

Monday Morning Blahs

After a fantastic early spring, normal weather for San Sebastian – rain, hail, and bone chilling cold – has returned. I went to bed last night nicely bundled up, but we didn't turn on the radiator. I ended up with a warm body and a cold head. By 3am, my sinuses started protesting and by 8am when I woke up, I was officially sick.

Raul made me breakfast and put the radiator right beside me on the sofa.

I'm going to take it easy today, and that includes no Someday Lessons. When we're sick, pampering is a good thing.

An (Almost) Middle-Aged Kid

Today we crossed the border into France. We went to Hendaye and walked along the cliffs above the Beach of the Two Twins. The wind picked up, promising horrific weather later, but at that moment, the cold air and the wind was invigorating.

I ran. I skipped. I did cartwheels. And I hugged Raul a lot.

Someday Lesson:

• Purposefully forget how old you are. Let yourself play like a kid.

Forced Organizing

There's nothing like having guests over to get one's space organized.

Today we have two friends from Madrid arriving. They are going to sleep in our bedroom and we're going to sleep at Raul's mother's house. This meant that we had to have the bedroom usable for others. Raul finally squeezed the rest of his clothes in our wardrobe (he went from a whole wall of storage space to sharing a four-door wardrobe and eight drawers).

The windows sparkle, the dresser and bedside table are clear of the usual bits of paper and other things that spontaneously appear in our pants pockets.

Now the challenge will be to keep it up!

Someday Lessons:

• Fixed deadlines are great motivators.
• It's not enough to organize – you have to maintain it.

A Someday Interview

My Blog Friend and former fellow Professional Organizers in Canada Board member, Janet Barclay of the blog From the Desk of Janet Barclay tagged me to write an interview with myself. So, here goes:

What is the story behind the name of your blog?

Most people suffer from Someday Syndrome in some form. It has three common ways of manifesting itself: I might need it someday, I'll get around to it someday and someday my ship will come in.

Why did you start blogging in the first place?

I'd been meaning to start a blog since 2004, but could never think of anything interesting to say. Then in 2006 when I decided to pursue my childhood dream of living in Europe and writing, I realized I finally had something to say. Surely I wasn't the only one who had been living with the idea that “someday” I would do something that I really loved doing instead of just going through life.

What is your best blogging experience?

Hearing that I've touched other people's lives. I often get comments or emails from people who tell me that they are on the way to getting rid of the word someday from their lives and that my blog has helped them focus on what they really want.

So far the worst experience?

Honestly I can't think of a single bad blog experience. Everyone has been super positive and super supportive.

What do you think will happen to your blog in 2008?

The blog started about with me making a grand gesture – living in Europe to write without working and without knowing where I'd end up. Now it's turning into a smaller journey, figuring out how to keep the sense of wonder and the constant pursuit for happiness in the face of day to day settled-down life.

Who I’m tagging:

Hmmm.. I'm always really bad at tagging people so I'm going to leave it open to anyone who wants to continue it. Just let me know you've done it – I want to read what you've said!

Someday Lessons:
None. Enjoy a lesson-free day today!

Resisting Raul

I've spent my life pretty much alone. Our family is loving but a bit disengaged (it's a British cultural thing). We live at a slight distance from the world. As a child, it was also for self-protection. My childhood friendships were about who would betray others first. My adult relationships have all been about remaining distant. One relationship was an attempt at engaging, but it turned out that his strong emotions were actually just another way of disengaging.

Raul's not like that, and that why I love him so much. However, it's hard to cope with sometimes. He asks that I live in the moment, that I consider him and that I get out of my own head more than once in a while.

That's a scary prospect and I'm totally resisting happiness because of decades of being disengaged (and self-protective). I'm not fearful, but being that vulnerable represents a huge shift in attitude, mentality and action. I'm not there yet.

I will do it, but I just need to resist the idea a little longer. For me, growth happens when I've fought against it for a while like a baby fights sleep.

Someday Lessons:

• External change is much easier to accomplish than internal change.
• Just because we know what needs to change, it doesn't mean we're capable of doing it.